Vegetables anyone?

BloodNinja: Wanna cyber?
MommyMelissa: Sure, you into vegetables?
BloodNinja: What like gardening an shit?
MommyMelissa: Yeah, something like that.
BloodNinja: Nuthin turns me on more, check this out
BloodNinja: You bend over to harvest your radishes. (pause)
MommyMelissa: is that it?
BloodNinja: You water your tomato patch.
BloodNinja: Are you ready for my fresh produce?
MommyMelissa: I was thinking of like, sexual acts INVOLVING vegetables... Can you make it a little more sexy for me? (pause)
BloodNinja: I touch you on your lettuce, you massage my spinach... Sexily.
BloodNinja: I ride your buttocks, like they were amber waves of grains.
MommyMelissa: Grain doesn't really turn me on... I was thinking more along the lines of carrots and zucchinis.
BloodNinja: my zucchinis carresses your carrots.
BloodNinja: Damn baby your right, this shit is HOT.
MommyMelissa: ...
BloodNinja: My turnips listen for the soft cry of your love. My insides turn to celery as I unleash my warm and sticky cauliflower of love.
MommyMelissa: What the fuck is this madlibs? I'm outta here.
BloodNinja: Yah, well I already Unleashed my cauliflower, all over your olives, and up in your eyes. Now you can't see. bitch.
MommyMelissa: whatever.

Papa John's pizza

BloodNinjaBloodNinja:Wanna cyber?
DirtyKateKK, but don't tell anybody ;-)
DirtyKateK:Who are you?
BloodNinja: I've got blond hair, blue eyes, I work out a lot
BloodNinja:And I have a part time job delivering for Papa John's in my Geo Storm.
DirtyKateK:You sound sexy.. I bet you want me in the back of your car..
BloodNinja:Maybe some other time. You should call up Papa John's and make an order
DirtyKateK: Haha! OK
DirtyKateK:Hello! I'd like an extra-EXTRA large pizza just dripping with sauce.
BloodNinja:Well, first they would say, "Hello, this is Papa John's, how may I help you", then they tell you the specials, and then you would make your order. So that's an X-Large. What toppings do you want?
DirtyKateK:I want everything, baby!
BloodNinja:Is this a delivery?
DirtyKateK:Umm...Yes
DirtyKateK:So you're bringing the pizza to my house now? Cause I'm home alone... and I think I'll take a shower...
BloodNinja:Good. It will take about fifteen minutes to cook, and then I'll drive to your house. **pause**
DirtyKateK:I'm almost finished with my shower... Hurry up!
BloodNinja:You can't hurry good pizza.
BloodNinja:I'm on my way now though pause**
DirtyKateK:So you're at my front door now.
BloodNinja:How did you know?
BloodNinja:I knock but you can't hear me cause you're in the shower. So I let myself in, and walk inside. I put the pizza down on your coffee table.
BloodNinja:Are you ready to get nasty, baby? I'm as hot as a pizza oven
DirtyKateKooohh yeah. I step out of the shower and I'm all wet and cold. Warm me up baby
BloodNinja:So you're still in the bathroom?
DirtyKateK:Yeah, I'm wrapping a towel around myself.
BloodNinja:I can no longer resist the pizza. I open the box and unzip my pants with my other hand. As I penetrate the gooey
cheese, I moan in ecstacy. The mushrooms and Italian sausage are rough, but
the sauce is deliciously soothing. I blow my load in seconds. As you leave the
bathroom, I exit through the front door....
DirtyKateK:What the fuck?
DirtyKateK:You perverted piece of shit
DirtyKateK:Fuck

I want to lick your earlob

BloodNinja: I lick your earlobe, and undo your watch.
Sarah19fca: mmmm, okay.
BloodNinja: I take yo pants off, grunting like a troll.
Sarah19fca: Yeah I like it rough.
BloodNinja: I smack you thick booty.
Sarah19fca: Oh yeah, that feels good.
BloodNinja: Smack, Smack, yeeeaahhh.
BloodNinja: I make some toast and eat it off your ass. Land O' Lakes butter all in your crack. Mmmm.
Sarah19fca: you like that?
BloodNinja: I peel some bananas.
Sarah19fca: Oh, what are you gonna do with those?
BloodNinja: get me peanuts. Peanuts from the ballpark.
Sarah19fca: Peanuts?
BloodNinja: Ken Griffey Jr. Yeaaaaahhh.
Sarah19fca: What are you talking about?
BloodNinja: I'm spent, I jump down into the alley and smoke a fatty. I throw rocks at the cats.
Sarah19fca: This is stupid.
BloodNinja: Stone Cold Steve Austin gives me some beer.
BloodNinja: Wanna Wrestle Stone Cold?
BloodNinja: Yeeaahhhh.
Sarah19fca: /ignore
BloodNinja: Its cool stone cold she was a bitch anyway.
BloodNinja: We get on harleys and ride into the sunset.